God's Best

On this day four years ago, I have committed my life to one man. And I celebrate this commitment by telling a story inspired, written and directed by God.

One evening while I was walking towards the jeepney stop along Ayala Ave after work, someone called my attention. It was a classmate from high school. We exchanged greetings and since I knew his girlfriend, I asked how she was doing. His hesitation to reply made me query him more, and he said that I should ask her. He changed the topic by inquiring if our church had calendared a Young Adults’ retreat since we are of the same faith but from different churches. He looked so sad, so I persistently asked him if he had a problem. He finally told me that he and his girlfriend broke up, but I should ask the details from his girlfriend.

All I saw was a brother who was so lost. I wanted him to hold on to the Lord so that he would never go astray in those trying times.

I also felt for his girlfriend who happened to be my friend. She was more of a friend than this classmate was. Hence, I connected with her to comfort her, and tell her that everything would be alright. I even encouraged her with hopeful words for reconciliation even though they were not of the same faith (mea culpa).

Blessedly, our church had lined up a youth and YA camp. I encouraged my classmate to attend this camp, which he did. My main plan was to surround him with male Christian friends who could help and console him without any chances of a rebound. During the camp, I purposely avoided him to force him to mingle with my male churchmates. Truthfully, it was quite difficult to evade him: I was the only one who knew him before camp, and I was the cell leader of a group of adolescent males (10-12 yo) who happened to be his roommates. I did not want him to befriend me because he was in a very delicate situation which can delude one’s self of falling in love but was merely on a rebound. In life, I have found that prevention is better than cure; that Joseph was wise to run away from temptation rather than face or play with it. Anyway, during our praise and worship, and prayer time in camp, I would see his face whenever I asked the Lord what His plans for me were. My thoughts were that God wanted me to pray for this classmate because he was really devastated that time, which I did.

After the camp, this classmate would text me, and I him. I would text him of the verses I read or the preachings I heard; but he was only one of the many recipients of those text messages. I included him in my list because I wanted to obey God and really prayed that he would be enveloped by His love.

After a few months, he declared his intentions of courting me. Oh, no! This was the very situation I was trying to steer clear of. Hence, I easily said that we could just be friends and get on with our friendship. But he was unrelenting. He said that I was God’s will for him, a line I had heard so many times before. He was very sure of it; it was crystal clear to him.

But not to me. Prior to that Ayala incident, I had made up my mind that my next boyfriend, who would eventually become my lifetime partner, would, in terms of importance, [a] be a bible-based believer, [b] not be someone who knew me when I was very young (I did not mean to spend the next half of my life with someone who knew me during the first half. It might bore me to tears!) , [c] be a man of great faith, someone who is very active in the activities of the Church and occupies a high position therein (his stature might prevent him from looking maliciously at any woman other than his wife), [d] be two or more years older than me (so that we would be able to adjust well with each other as studies have shown), [e] not so good-looking, but merely acceptable-looking (I do not have a problem with his fidelity, but I might have one on other women who think of themselves as irresistible). He only qualified on the first.

Because of his forceful conviction, I allowed him to court me, but without any promise or hope of an ensuing romantic relationship. I would merely open myself to the idea that he MIGHT be telling the truth that we were meant for each other, because I really could not see even a trace of such tale. Thus, our courtship began.

As it progressed, it became clearer to him that I was God’s best for him. But, again, not to me. He was baffled that I could not see it. He became irritated that I was still struggling with the idea that he threatened to stop courting me. A part of me was glad that the ordeal was over, but a part was truly saddened since I began opening up my feelings to him. For years I had been meditating on my requirements for the next-boyfriend, and there came someone who did not qualify but one telling me that he was my pre-ordained lifetime partner. How can he expect me to change my perception, expectations and aspirations overnight?

After a few days, he came back and asked to court me again. He said the same lines, and apologized for rushing things. His return set the seriousness of our courtship. It was then that I realized that this was for keeps. I prayed harder to God. But the more I cried to Him to let this go, the more He made him closer to me.

I said, “Lord, I need a man who has great faith. I need someone who is active in the Church, not some attendee. I need a spiritually grown man!”

My sixty-something year-old mentor told me that we are all diamond in the rough. We are still work in progress. He might not appear to be like David, a man after God’s own heart. But he may be one someday. The only criterion God had given us was that we ought to have the same beliefs.

I said, “Lord, I do not want someone who is habulin. From his looks alone, I know that many women would want to have a piece of him.”

My devotions led me to the 1 Samuel 16:7b, “The LORD does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart."

Still, I did not give in. And another “option” was coming toward the picture. I was toying with the idea of that option. But God, being a real Father, made me ill to refrain from going out of the house and going for it. Sometimes, God has a weird sense of humor, but i do appreciate it :)

What can I do but obey? And after fifteen months, we vowed before the Lord that we would love each other and never part for the rest of our lives. And though not everyday is ups, we try to submit the downs unto the Lord. Truly, God's best is the very best!



Do you not know?
Have you not heard?
The LORD is the everlasting God,
the Creator of the ends of the earth.
He will not grow tired or weary,
and his understanding no one can fathom.
-Isaiah 40:28